And then there was one...

I have some sad news to report.  Engi-Nerd and I will not be getting married and having babies, mostly because we're never going to meet in person.  Our brief but important (at least for the blog) text relationship ended this evening when he completely freaked out over the prospect of going through with our date.  Here's what happened:

The short version - We texted too long before actually meeting.

The long version - He's a prick.

We had been messaging and texting since September 19 - that's basically a lifetime in the online dating universe.  We had been texting every day since we first started communicating on the site.  We usually talk a bit throughout the day, but he always at least texts me good morning and goodnight. Today was no different, I got my good morning text, and I responded.  He was silent the rest of the day, but that's not unusual.  I didn't start to get suspicious until around 8:30 when I still hadn't heard from him.  We supposedly had a date scheduled for tomorrow night, so I figured he'd get with me at some point about the plan.  After all, this is the guy who texted me a list of questions so that he could plan the perfect date.

I finally texted him, just something innocuous - "How was your day?"  He responded with something about how he'd just gotten home from the gym.  I let about 15 minutes pass, and he never texted anything else or mentioned our date.  So like a loser, I asked him if he was still interested in meeting tomorrow. He responded that he was just going to ask me about that (sure you were), then he said, "I'm thinking maybe drinks tomorrow?"

Drinks?  What the hell is he talking about, drinks?

I got a really bad feeling about the whole thing.  I gave myself a few minutes to think through everything, and considered my options - 1) I could meet him for a really awkward pity drink since it's pretty clear he's no longer interested in meeting me, or 2) call him out on his bull-shit and save myself the trouble of being humiliated.  I went with door number 2.  After all, the last time I didn't follow my gut, I ended up getting molested hugged by Miami Vice.

I sent Engi-Nerd the following text: "It's clear you're not as into this as you once were.  Last week you're trying to plan a dinner someplace I haven't been, and this week you want to switch it to drinks. I'm going to follow my gut on this one and say we should probably just be done."

No. Response.

Here's what I should have said:

Yo, Engi-Prick, what's your deal?  Oh wait, I know, you saw Katy Perry shake her ass for all of Dallas and now you can't be satisfied by a normal girl.  Well, your loss.  You see, there's plenty of guys who are happy to take me to dinner.  They don't seem to have a problem following through with the plans they make, but then again, those guys actually want to be in a relationship.  You, on the other hand, are a 36 year-old bachelor and likely to remain so since you're such a freaking coward. Take my advice, next time a girl catches your eye, do her a favor and don't start the conversation where you're all charming and cute. Just be yourself instead - it will save her a lot of time and energy thinking you actually care about getting to know her.  A year from now, when you're 37 and still all alone, don't call me.  My boyfriend won't like it and neither will I.


Today's Updates

• I'm mentally worn out, and not just from the frustrating conclusion to the Engi-Nerd saga.  I think I need to take a few days off from this whole experiment and recharge.  With that in mind, I won't be posting any blogs until after my next date with Milton......unless, of course, something really interesting happens.  I wouldn't leave you guys in the dark like that.  
• Little does Milton know, he's just been granted 1000 bonus points for not being an ass-hole.  See fellas, it really is that easy.